I've had this blog on the tip of my tongue for a while now but I haven't been able to spit it out. I figured while I'm grilling burgers maybe it will come out...
I always thought that I never have any regrets for the things I've done in my life but sometimes I can lay in bed and things float through my head:
- Why didn't I walk that special person to class in High School?
- Why didn't I make that move when I got the green light?
- Why didn't I take the full ride at Southern Miss and came to FSU?
- Hell...why didn't I just go to Alabama with some of my other friends than coming to FSU??
- Why didn't I kiss that girl after a lovely evening out?
- Why didn't I buy that house in Killearn?
- Why did I flip out that morning rather than keep my mouth shut?
- Why didn't I just give her a ring???
During Middle School I was friends with a guy named Curtis Council (I might not be spelling his name right). We were inseparable. He would spend time at my house and I would go over to his place. We did everything together...he was one of my first best friends.
One day he asked if I could come over and play. I wasn't feeling well so I didn't go over to his house. I didn't know but I wouldn't see him again after that day. He went to play outside and had an accident playing in a tree. I never saw him again. I never got the chance to say good-bye. It's something I've carried on my mind for a long time and I've never said anything about it until tonight. I wish I could go back and say, "Hey man, I'll get Mom to drop me off and I'll be over soon." Who knows if there was anything I could do..or if it wouldn't have happened but it did happen and it's something to think about.
I think it's one reason why I treasure friendships so deeply and when people leave me I take it very hard. As much as I am a "Social Butterfly", I don't make friends that easily so when I do it means I don't want to lose that friendship. This could really go into another conversation, but I'm sure someone will get wind of it and then I'll get another evil note telling me I need to "atone" for the things I've done wrong. Fuck that.
Anyway, there are a couple more that I'll talk about but I think I'll end it for now. It's been a long couple days and a home cooked burger should make me feel better.
Treasure those friendships that you have because in the blink of an eye...they could be over.
Do you have any regrets you want to share? I think you know my email address if you want to tell me.. :)
Until next time...Peace, Love and Thick Blankets!